Jaws 3

Former shark attack survivors find it’s still not safe to go back to the water.

This 1983 classic (CLASSIC I TELL YOU!) stars Dennis Quaid, Bess Armstrong,, and Simon MacCorkindale. It was written by Carl Gottlied and maybe Sci Fi Great Richard Matheson. Joe Alves directed.

The children of Martin Brody try to start life anew after two disastrous ocean related incidents. Unfortunately these attempts aren’t far enough from the water, as soon swimming death makes a third attempt at claiming them.

Which shouldn’t be a shock, as this is call Jaws 3 and not The Happy Life of the Brodys.

Let me get this right out of the way:  I love this movie.  Love.  It.  I’ve watched it more than the original.  It is a fun, fun, fun movie.

Too bad it’s not a very good one.

Oh, the acting’s fine.  Too many pros involved for it to be any other way.

Directing and script, however, eh, not so much.

The film’s not scary.  Not in the least.  Doesn’t help that it’s a 3-D movie filled with “Hey, let’s throw something in the audience’s faces, give ’em a jump” moments.

Worse, anyone whose watched Shark Week probably groans their way through the shark bits.  Sharks that can swim backwards?  Roaring sharks?  Really?

Still, in it’s defense, it doesn’t waste much of the viewers time, and, again, I think it’s a load of fun.

I’d call this one a mid-way film (1 points).  I know, I know, it really should be bad, but I think it does enough of it’s job.  It entertains.  It may not scare, it may have special effect moments that stagger the imagination in the worst ways possible, but if you come at it in the spirit of Bad Movies (perhaps even MST3K or Rifftracks) you should be fine.

Oh, and did I mention I love this movie (2 points)?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I have no taste.  No taste at all.