First posted in a different form on September 10, 2012
It came to past that Satan, the very devil himself, decided to claim the soul of a troubled small town priest. And so, in order to do so, he took the form of a cobra and rode into town in the baggage car of a train. Verily it ’twas so and not completely silly at all.
Jaws of Satan 1:1-3
Such effort for something only I’ll find funny.
Where it not for a prominent nude picture in an early scene, Jaws of Satan could have been any one of dozens of made-for-TV movies. Which is damning a hell of a lot of quality TV, but that’s what this movie feels like. A TV show or movie.
It’s not scary, it’s not challenging, and on top of it all it isn’t very original, either. Its depiction of Satan is questionable at best, as is some of the F/X. The kindest you can be about the script is that it could have been worse. Something I say about a lot of films, but still.
That said, nothing about Jaws of Satan reeks of awful. The actors do their job competently and as I try to speak truthfully about these sort of things, I enjoyed watching it despite it’s flaws. That alone means it did it’s job. Just not well.
So what’s the score, right? Well, we’re going with mediocre. (1 point). The first time I reviewed this flick I called it forgettable, but sitting here rewriting it I seem to bring back quite a bit of it. The trouble is, I just don’t care (1 point).
Let’s make Jaws of Satan as a time killer. No more, no less, and no worse for being so. Just disappointing, after a fashion.
Overall Score: 2 total point out of a possible 4